Resilience: Not one size fits all

The article argues that resilience is a unique and individual process, not a fixed trait or simply "pushing through" pain (grit).

• True resilience is about understanding what you currently need to help you grow, which can mean taking action, resting, asking for help, or revisiting old wounds with greater understanding.

• Psychological Flexibility is presented as a helpful framework for resilience, which involves:

  • Acceptance: Allowing difficult thoughts and emotions to exist without fighting them.

  • Cognitive Defusion: Noticing thoughts as mere thoughts, not absolute truths.

  • Present-Moment Awareness: Staying grounded in the now to respond rather than react.

  • Values: Using what is meaningful to you as a compass for choosing which struggles to engage with.

  • Committed Action: Taking small, values-based steps.

• For some, resilience also means containment—the ability to hold emotions safely (e.g., using grounding strategies) without becoming overwhelmed.

• The process is grown through recognizing personal mental habits (like catastrophizing or avoidance) without judgment and making small, sustainable shifts.